Wife: honey can you please help me clean the garden Husband: do i look like a gardener? Wife:ooh am sorry honey, ok then fix bathroom door plz Husband: do i look like a carpenter? husband walks out, at returning, he finds the garden cleaned and the door fixed. Husband: I knew my wife will do this all by herself Wife: its not me Husband: who then? Wife: Jonny our neighbor Husband: how much did u pay him? Wife: No, he just gave me 2 options, bread or sex Husband: i hope you gave him bread Wife: Do I look like a baker?